I had my first run-in with the cops. It wasn't pretty. Good thing I didn't wind up in jail. All I did was press a button on the elevator in a shopping area. How was I supposed to know it said EMERGENCY? I'm still working on spelling cat and dog. So this policeman comes and wants to know who's commiting a crime. I told him I didn't do anything wrong. I wasn't even getting a time-out. I also said I was sorry. I think that's the only reason I didn't get arrested. Boy, I hope the police come this fast when there is someone being mean.

Hillary won Pennsylvania! Very exciting! But then everyone said she was going to lose. Now everyone seems down on Obama. Something about how he's no good at bowling and doesn't like to eat cheesesteaks. And the TV keeps showing this church guy shouting and using a bad word about America. I've decided politics is too hard to figure out. And this campaign has been going on for almost half my life.
I've got to make some money. I realized that it makes no sense to be giving away kisses for free. Why not charge? So I announced that kisses will now cost 4 dollars and 3 cents. I should be able to buy some nice stuff in no time.

Why does this Obama guy keep talking about people being bitter? What's he got to be bitter about? I thought he was beating Hillary. Now I'm bitter about lots of things. Having to take a nap. Having to go to bed when I DON'T WANT TO. Being bugged every five minutes about whether I have to go to the potty. What's so great about going to the potty, anyway?
I decided I'm going to save the pennies in my Pinnochio bank for a new TV. I don't like our old one. But it may take forever to have enough pennies, so I need to find a job. I'm good at taking care of the seeds in our backyard with my watering can. Someone should hire me as a gardener. Doing it all day might make me tired. But not so tired that I'll want to take a nap!